How often do we hear men complain that they
‘just don’t get women’? That’s because by our nature we’re complex and
confusing. But no-one understands a woman like another woman. We need other women in our lives to walk
along side us, to guide us, and to pull us up on things we could do better even
when it hurts. We need sisters who will speak the truth in love, lift us up out of despair and rejoice with us in times of joy.
Not only am I blessed with a real sister
who I can share my faith with, but also with countless other sisters in Christ
who have come into my life over the years and left their uniquely shaped marks.
I feel so blessed by these women – those I’ve known all my life who continue to
shape the person I’m becoming, those who I meet for the first time right when God
knows that I need them and go on to become close friends, and those who enter
my life only for a season but leave me thoroughly changed.
But though sisterhood is largely about
loving each other and building each other up in Christ, there is so much more
to it. It’s about moving past the level of friendship where we focus on all
that is good to avoid rejection, and entering the stage of the relationship
where we are completely open and honest with each other regardless of the risks
to our pride. Sisterhood is as much about constructive criticism as it is about
compliments: it requires us to have the courage to call each other out when we
drift off the path – not to expose our flaws, but to cover them with what is
right. Literally:
Sister – the bond we have as members of
God’s family.
Hood – covering
with love, and with the Holy Spirit.
I have three incredible accountability
partners (yes, three – one person alone couldn’t handle me!) who each firmly
but lovingly hold me accountable to God in different areas of my life. They
constantly amaze me with their capacity for love, and their willingness to go
out of their way to support and encourage me when I doubt myself or even doubt
God’s love for me. But I also respect them for their fearlessness in equally
lovingly challenging me when I get carried away with my own desires rather than
focusing on God’s.
The other day I came across this passage in
‘Life of the Beloved’ by Henri Nouwen, and I think it describes perfectly our
need for sisters in Christ to hold us accountable!
‘My own experience with anguish has been that facing it and living
it through is the way to healing. But I cannot do that on my own. I need
someone to keep me standing in it, to assure me that there is peace beyond
darkness, life beyond death and love beyond fear.’
Romans 12:10 calls us to ‘Love each other more like brothers and sisters. Give each
other more honour than you would want for yourself.’ Sometimes that
requires sacrificing what we want in the present (ie. not being afraid to speak
the truth because it risks disrupting the peace) in order to move towards what’s
best for everyone in the long run. As sisters we need to…
- Encourage each other, and build each other up.
- Speak the truth in LOVE, not self-righteousness.
- Accept our differences and work for the common good.
- Pray for and with each other continually.
- Serve each other faithfully.
Thank God for the sisters He has placed in your life, and
seek His guidance in how best you can serve them in return.
